Or maybe he was too naive. He naively and wishfully thought that the more or less "mother-son" affection over the decades would still exist. As a "mother", which "position to take" did not require any truths or facts. Choosing to believe her own child should be a conditioned reflex.

But between Shen Yiqing and him, there was no such conditioned reflex. Shen Yiqing rationally needed a "fact" before deciding which side to stand on.

Jiang Cheng could understand, but had difficulty accepting it.

It took him a very long time to forcibly stop dwelling and getting tangled up in those past decades. And now it was all being turned up again.

"Xiao Cheng, actually although you... But I still don't think you would take his money," Shen Yiqing said, "It's just Li Hui sounded very credible, even crying, so I wanted to ask you first."

"It's fine," Jiang Cheng laughed, "You don't know our people here well enough. If you two were face to face, he might even cut his wrists in front of you to prove his innocence."

"Where are you living now? Did you move out?" Shen Yiqing asked.

"Rented my own place." Jiang Cheng replied.  

Shen Yiqing sighed softly and was silent for a long time. Jiang Cheng felt he could guess what she wanted to say and was hesitating about. After all, she was the only person in his mind associated with the word "mother". He knew her pretty well.

"I'm doing great now," he put out the cigarette butt in the ashtray, "I... I'm fine right here."

"You're just one person..." Shen Yiqing still sounded a little hesitant.

Jiang Cheng interrupted her, "I'm not just one person."

I'm just a dog.

He tried very hard to control himself from saying the last sentence.

But he suddenly wanted to laugh really badly.

Then he just laughed.

"What's so funny?" Shen Yiqing was puzzled by his laughter and clearly unhappy, "Why are you still so casual about your life?"

"Casual?" Jiang Cheng stopped laughing, "No, I'm not casual at all about my life. I'm very clear now what I need and what I don't need."

"Alright," Shen Yiqing probably didn't want to keep talking to him, "If that's what you think, I won't interfere."

"Thank you." Jiang Cheng said.

"Let me ask one last thing," Shen Yiqing calmed down again, "You just said you're not just one person?"

"Yeah," Jiang Cheng glanced at the closed bedroom door, "I'm not just one person right now."

I'm a dog.

Jiang Cheng didn't know what was up with him, his mind was stuck on this phrase like glue that he just couldn't get past.

Although very annoyed and irritated, he still wanted to laugh, really wanted to laugh. He had to bite his lips to stop himself from laughing out loud again like he was on drugs or something.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" Shen Yiqing asked.

Girlfriend.

Puppy love.

These were things Shen Yiqing never explicitly prohibited him from, but her disdainful comments on Pan Zhi who was always "in the middle of puppy love" revealed her attitude.

Jiang Cheng stood up and walked to the bedroom window, looking at the night view outside that was already imbued with loneliness of being forgotten, and now also carried a hint of the autumn air, suddenly feeling an urge to shake off all shackles from his body.

Although he didn't even know what exactly were the shackles, he still wanted to yell, wanted to tear off his clothes, wanted to jump out, just take a step into the void.  

"No," he looked at the particularly round moon tonight, closed his eyes and took a breath, "I got a boyfriend."

He could no longer hear clearly what Shen Yiqing's reaction was on the other end, and he didn't want to hear clearly either. He just felt that in his mind, in his body, in those intertwined shadows outside that seemed exceptionally dark because of the moonlight, there was howling wind blowing past.  

It blew through his entire body feeling refreshing.

"Thank you for raising me all these years, for spending so much effort on me," Jiang Cheng closed his eyes, "but I didn't bring you any joy at all, I'm very sorry, but there is no way to remedy it now. After so many things through all these years, it can't be patched up even if I try, I'm sorry, you don't need to take care of me anymore from now on, I'll be fine, no matter where I am, I have my own way to prove my own meaning."

Shen Yiqing was saying something, but the wind was too strong for Jiang Cheng to hear clearly.

"Change to a new number," Jiang Cheng said, "I really don't want you to get harassed by those shameless people because of me anymore, and don't tell me the new number either," Jiang Cheng said, "also, just this once, I hope you can believe me, I really can live well."

When Gu Fei opened the bedroom door, he was about to light a cigarette. He had blinked back and forth between the bedroom door and window at lightning speed already seven or eight times.  

Every time thinking Jiang Cheng was going to come out, he would hurry back to the window pretending to calmly try to light a cigarette. Seeing no movement, he would go over to listen again, then go back to the window pretending to light a cigarette.

But this time he really wanted to smoke, and Jiang Cheng finally came out, carrying the thermos with chicken wings.

"Finished the call?" Gu Fei put the cigarette and lighter on the table next to him.

"Yeah," Jiang Cheng nodded, "Just now I forgot to put the lid on, it might have cooled down a bit, let's heat it up?"

"Give it to me," Gu Fei took the thermos from him, "Just pour it into a pot to heat up."

Jiang Cheng followed him into the kitchen, leaning against the wall watching him busy around.

Gu Fei took a small pot to the sink to wash it, then poured the chicken wings in and put it on the stove to heat up. Jiang Cheng just leaned there without saying a word.  

He didn't ask either. It was very clear why Shen Yiqing would make this call, because Li Hui had called and told her, no one would be in a good mood for this kind of conversation.

"Starting from today," Jiang Cheng suddenly spoke, his voice very calm.

"Ah," Gu Fei turned his head.

Jiang Cheng's whole demeanor was very serious, his expression like he had made some major decision.

"I will sleep one hour later every day," Jiang Cheng said.  

"Huh?" Gu Fei didn't react for a second, "Why sleep one hour later?"

"To study," Jiang Cheng said.

"Oh!" Gu Fei didn't expect at all that what Jiang Cheng wanted to say would be such a major decision, he was at a loss for how to respond, "Oh!"

"You sleep later too, help me review, just until 1am." Jiang Cheng said.

"Okay." Gu Fei nodded.  

"Thanks for the trouble," Jiang Cheng patted his shoulder, "Xiao Gu."

Gu Fei swiftly reached out to feel his forehead. No fever.

"What is it, Xiao Gu?" Jiang Cheng asked.

"Nothing...Xiao Jiang," Gu Fei said, "The chicken wings are almost heated up, drink a glass of milk later okay?"

"Okay." Jiang Cheng nodded and turned to go back to the bedroom.

Then Gu Fei heard an especially cheerful laugh from Jiang Cheng in the bedroom.  

He hesitated for a moment, turned off the stove and went into the bedroom as well.

Jiang Cheng was lying on the bed laughing uncontrollably.